Hello friends!
I hope you all are enjoying being isolated in your respective homes.
I don’t know about you, but I feel like Quarantine has been a bit of a pity party, and I can’t blame us for it. This is a weird adventure that we’re all on.
But you know who I really pity? Ben (aka QB) who is stuck with me! We went from spending 3 - 5 awake hours together during weekdays to spending ALL THE HOURS together. In case you aren’t the best at math, that’s a lot more hours.
Sometimes me doesn’t even want to be stuck with me. So as another person, I definitely wouldn’t want to be stuck with me! Because as we already know from previous ramblings, I hate to shower and I like to complain. And that’s normal Lisa, not even QL, who is an exacerbated version of normal Lisa.
This Quaran-transition (that didn’t really work, but we’re here) is a big change and one that calls for some praise for our Quarantine buddies...At least if you’re anything like me who goes on several daily rants about stupid shiz.
Also LOL, I love that Ben’s Quarantine initials are QB and so is the general Quarantine Buddy initials, so you can all apply QB to your own situations!
So, today’s post is an ode (read: apology) to the people who are stuck with us!
Unless, you are stuck with your dog. Then just give yourself an aggressive pat on the back because you are making your dog’s life by being home 24/7.
To the people who are actually stuck with us, sorry bout it.
For anybody saying, wow, we’re all so lucky to be getting extra time together, I don’t disagree but please remember, this isn’t the glamorous kind of stuck with each other. This isn’t your bougie, all-inclusive vacation where you’re always comfortably tipsy and never have to cook and you’re super relaxed.
This is the kind where you had a lot of cool plans and they all got cancelled so you’re grumpy and you’re sleepy and you’re hangry and you’re pale and you’re out of toilet paper because you thought you should save some for the rest of the world, but now you just wish you hid some in your secret stash because you didn’t realize your QB was so FULL OF SHIT - literally.
And it’s just an endless cycle of that ^. So, yes, let’s appreciate this time, but with a little perspective...
To the people who are stuck with us, sorry we’re different during the 9 hours a day we’re at work than we are the other 6 hours we’re at home.
Sorry we never put on real pants during quarantine (looking at you all of my real coworkers, not my fake animal coworkers who don’t need to wear real pants).
Sorry we’re super bored and thus demanding extra interaction (though this doesn’t actually require an apology).
Sorry we’re trying out new looks and testing them out on you. You’re right, most of them are really WEIRD.
Sorry our hair hasn’t been cut in far too long and we’re looking really scraggly.
Sorry we’ve stopped working out and been eating only chips for 11 days. Or sorry we’re working out more than usual but have stopped showering afterwards.
Sorry we’re forcing you to change your clothes LITERALLY every time you go out into the world and then come back inside. (Wait, is that just me?)
Sorry we’re...fill in the blanks with any other random thing that our collective QBs deserve our apologies for.
And to all the people out there who are their best selves right now and have nothing to apologize for, why don’t you apologize for making everyone else look bad!
How are we actually handling Quarantine?
The above are pretty generic, so let me hit you with an anecdote about how my household is adjusting to Quarantine, #QuarantineCommunication and apologies.
The Woes of Quarantining with QB
Now that I’m home forever, I realized that QB doesn’t actually put his dishes in the dishwasher after he uses them, as we’ve agreed upon. No, he actually just lets them pile up throughout the day and puts them in the dishwasher right before I get home. Regular Lisa, of course, didn’t know the difference. They were in the dishwasher when I got home, so they were essentially the same thing.
But now that I solely exist within my home, IT’S DRIVING ME INSANE. I see no other solution than to cut QB off of food for the remainder of this quarantine AKA the foreseeable future. JUST KIDDING, he’s using the dog bowls.
Don’t worry, though, that was the subject of one of my aforementioned rants so he’s already said sorry bout it.
The Confusion of Quarantining with QL
For QB, on the other hand, he has quickly realized he doesn’t know when he’s approved to speak to me during the work day. I have been increasingly annoyed both when he does talk to me and when he does not talk to me. I understand, that’s very confusing, but what is a QG (Quarantine girl) supposed to do? Obviously, continue being extremely unclear with my expectations.
Don’t worry, I’ve already convinced Ben that he should always know when he can and cannot communicate with me. JUST KIDDING AGAIN. I said I’m sorry...I think.
So that’s what we’re dealing with.
The Good News - Yes, there's good news.
If these are our biggest #QuarantineStruggs I’d say we’re doing pretty good. Let’s cut ourselves and our QBs a break because we’re all new to this global pandemic situation.
Hang in there, friends! And remember, it could be worse. You could (actually) be stuck with me.
Cheers,
QL
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